Reflective Essay: La Familia

La Familia

“Oh, Godfather, What can I do? The debate contest big shots are giving me nothing. I have no prizes, respect or any kind of reputation! Oh, what can I do, what can I do?”

“You can stop being a pu$$y and act like a MAN! What’s the matter with you? Is this what you turn out to be? A weeping debater who can’t even make it to the breaks? What is this nonsense? Ridiculous. You spend time with La Familia? A man who does not spend time with his family can never be a real man. Come to practices. Prepare more than others. Be proud of La Familia. I want you to be more diligent. And in a month from now, this debate big shots gonna give you what you need.”

“Thank you, Hyungseok. I’d do anything for La Familia and for you, Godfather. ”

When I first watched the movie Mario Puzo’s Godfather, I thought of our school’s English Debating Society. From the structure to close companionship, the two have many similarities. Because EDS has to go to many debate contests and compete with other schools, it is almost always in a combat form.

Let me explain the structure by comparing it to the family tree of Corleone Crime Family. On the top of the family tree, there is the  Godfather, now Naan Cho senior, in succession of Michael Hyungseok Kim. Under the boss, we have the underboss who advises and replaces the boss when the superior is absent. After that, we have several caporegimes that lead smaller sections of the family. Usually, debate teams are composed of three people. So caporegimes, who are usually sophomores who have more experience in debating take lead in team along with two soldiers. Soldiers are freshmen who are inexperienced. 

But there are times when the boss or the underboss cannot take care of each teams. When such times come, the caporegimes or soldiers have to be on themselves. During the first semester, I spent a great portion of time coping with the tough practice schedules of EDS, and watching how Sophomore Michael Hyungseok Kim in 15^th wave successfully lead the family: arrange schedules, undergo conflicts with other clubs, and negotiate with contest managers who are usually arrogant and not cooperative.

But then came summer vacation, and Hyungseok had to go to United States. Since his term had ended with the start of the vacation, we had an absence of leadership. Because he was the captain who did loads of work during his time, we felt some difficulties in arrangements for the Asian Schools Debating Championship that was during the summer vacation.

And the results for our team were pretty disastrous. We didn’t make it to the top 16teams, making it hard to compete in the final rounds. It was first time in my debate career to not make it to the finals, and everyone in our team was depressed.

But then came a call to our team from the committee that we would be able to compete in the finals. They said one team was disqualified, and we were next in charge. The finals were to be started the day after the announcement of the break teams, so we went home happily.

The next day, Seoul was flooded with the downpour of rain that had never occurred during the close 30 years. Everywhere it was flooding; on the road with rain, in the subways with people. But anyhow, we managed to arrive at the conference center where the competition was to be held.

We asked where the debate room was, and the committee told us that we had no debates.

They said there must have been some kind of misunderstanding solely by from our side, and insisted that we should leave immediately or watch others compete. This made me very angry. We came through the downpour of rain, endured biased adjudications, underwent many delays, and this was what the committee gave us.

If it were for other countries, this would not be much of a problem. I would have issued a complaint, the committee would have apologized, and that would be the end of controversies. But we live in Korea. In Korea, most competitions are run by a limited group of people, and those people are usually ones who allocate prizes and evaluate students. Not only that, because committees of various contests are closely related, it is a dangerous thing to object to their decisions or even to their mistakes.

But still, I felt insulted. I had many resentments piling up. I was angry at their arrogant behavior, sloppy arrangements, biased adjudications, and most of all, their attitude. In this case, it was clearly their fault that we had to come through the flood only to do nothing. I wanted compensation, or at least an apology.

The leading caporegime of our team disagreed. She said I might be on their blacklist or at least be recognized as an uncooperative person, and that it would be critical for my future debate career. My freshman teammate thought so as well. Since there was no captain to make a go-ahead, it was up to our team whether to fight over this matter.

If I just let go of this just like other teams, then the same thing would be repeated over and over again. What I wanted-what was most important for me- was a guarantee that no such things would happen ever again. I wanted the committee to respect its guests, or at least our school. So despite all the objections, I made my point to the committee.

Although things didn’t turn out to be so great (in fact, I had to make heated and ugly quarrels with authorities of the competition) nor succeeded in getting concrete compensation, I did win an apology at the end of the day. My cellphone became iron-hot, my throat went hoarse, and maybe I did get on their black list, but I was proud of myself. I felt like crossing the threshold. It was a small incident with a small trouble, but I learned what it was like to represent La Familia and fight for them.

Loss of Wisdom

<Loss of Wisdom: Docile Bodies>

We live in a world of efficiency.

And that efficiency is backed up with diverse sophisticated systems of bureaucracy. Bureaucracy consists of specific procedures that authorities propose, and people follow. Doing so in the field of education brought about two inevitable results: mediocrity and docility of young minds.

Barry Schwartz seems to agree with me. In his lecture “Loss of Wisdom”, he argues of how moral wisdom derived from free-will and experience has disappeared due to the sophisticated procedures that have infiltrated the life-world of people, including children. He suggests an example to show a case when individual decision make better results than the docile one. Hospital janitors have a detailed script of what and how to do their job at which time. But do most experienced janitors follow such process? No, they don’t.  They don’t vacuum the visitor’s lounge when there are worried families all day. They clean some people’s room more than required when the patience were in comatose. After all, procedures can’t make every exceptional cases into a procedure, because the moment something deviates from the rule, then the procedure would be ineffective compared to the individual decisions. What procedure does is keep a "objective" but mediocre standard, but not care and human interactions. Individuals have moral skills to figure out what “doing right” means. The key of his lecture was that planned procedures hinder people from making more reasonable and moral decisions.

Same for public schools. Every modernized nation has a detailed school curriculum that includes what and how to teach and evaluate. The idea to take a minimal standard is fairly ok. It does not allow jeopardizing or too much deviation from the standard. But what most governments seem to do is overdo that. By being specific on what to learn, student’s range of thought can be expected and set by the authorities. But how do they resignate their curriculum? We have austere standardized test and federal/state grants to make schools function in a way they want. This method kills progdigal individuals and replace it with predictable ones.

Through this process, authorities can create a discourse* that they influence and get affected themselves. Discourse is like setting the agenda for a certain group. Standardized schools, standardized tests and standardized teachers make the production of discourse in a very minuscule size. Instead of setting an agenda in a wholesome scale, it is inserting the discourse for every single individual. Then what is the purpose of doing so? Or what is the expected result of setting the agenda for each and every individual?

Irascibly, ,t is making docile bodies**. Although it would be hard to prove that a government had an intention of doing so, and its expected results are such people, it can be inferred that the outcome of these policies are students who are obedient. It is almost frightening to see how juveniles from very young age seem to follow the social norms learned in school. Social norm itself may be regarded as a culture, but if it has an intention or a definite leading outcome, then it should be alerted of. Since it is less tangible, it would be hard to realize, which makes it more dangerous.

Then how are docile bodies made? Barry Schwartz does not elaborate in depth on this point. He just states that bureaucratic procedures make people dumb. But there are other scholars who have expanded the argument on the intention of doing so. Michelle Foucalt, on his book Surveillance and Punishment have explained various methods used to create virulent discourse and eventually docile bodies. Let me introduce the points he have made, and add my interpretations regarding the field of education.

[Space and Docile Bodies]

(1) Closure of Specific Spaces

It is important that the disciplined are located in a secluded area. Such area should be a place that the ruling entity has full control over. Instead of home-schooling or private enterprises (“Hagwons”), the government prefers public school where it owns and makes rules. Middlemen (in the case of schools teachers) can then have a concentrated control over the mass. Locating students in public schools makes them included in the system-world***, which is the juxtaposition**** of life-world*****, meaning an environment that individuals face undistorted communication, which are environments like students’ households.

(2) Preference of Minuscule Units

The first method is not the solution to the randomness or chaos that authorities want to avoid. Even in an enclosure, the mass can still rampage tentatively. Another key point is “how to use the ruling power”. Ruling entities should divide the profusing mass into minuscule parts so that their power is distributed for each part. For schools, all individuals should be given an assigned place to be at all times. This blockades individuals from others, and thus is easier measured, evaluated, controlled and utilized. Since the power is directed towards the individual, not an associate of individuals, the objects of the power function are helpless. Less digressed, more the power.

(3) Assigning Purpose for Each Space

This is the utilizing process of space. The authorities not only use empty rooms to separate individuals, but at best use them. This includes wards or cafeterias. The purpose of each territory is clearly denoted, which enhances efficiency and hinders students from practicing their free will. This is consistent with Ford’s fastidious division of labor. This system belittles individuals and change them into parts of systems.

(4) Ranking within the Utilized Space

The significance of hierarchy is that it differentiates and assigns dissimilar power for each individual. This is evident in schools. Ranking by age, grades and discipline is evident. Most Korean schools use test scores to allocate students in various classes. KMLA is one example too. Dorm rooms and desks are given in the order of GPA. Although the students who are influenced may be aware of this, what they have is a fragmented knowledge. They do not know when and how the knowledge of individuals would be utilized. This creates a panopticon-ic state. The students know that surveillance exists, but they do not know when and how the surveillance would occur, and how the information obtained from it would be used. Thus, students become vulnerable due to the information inequality.

[Tests and Docile Bodies]

Tests serve as determinants in Algebra. It differentiates and ranks individuals. By using measurements for immeasurable beings such as students’ capacity, it makes the objects of the test function believe that capacities are scalable when it is not. It also is a definite way of leading students as authorities want. By making the results influential upon the interests of students, it compels them to have an ego or have similar traits that are preferable for the test-makers. Test records students. It enables authorities to evaluate human beings. Shocking thing. To think about it, how can an individual be evaluated? Test is the most powerful tool that transforms egos into factual cases. Authorities acknowledge about the individuals they rule upon. By doing so, each individuals can be compared as coordinates on a plane. Then we have the mean, or the orthodox standard of an association. Persons can be measured in the sense of how much each of them is deviated from such standards or means. The pivotal result of test is “measurable individuals”. The data is utilized for various purposes, which the people in a passive position only know that such data exists, not knowing when and how it would be used.

This relates to the incongruous bureaucracy that Barry Schwartz is criticizing. It tries to standardize things that cannot be standardized. Bureaucracy makes humans passive. Instead of putting it in an active position, it idolizes efficiency and mechanics. Barry Schwartz seems to state that such passiveness is inefficient.

What Barry Schwartz presents is not much different from the previous analysis. Procedures make people docile, unable to make better decisions. Foucalt’s description only explains the process of doing so.

Review: "열꽃"

“열꽃 Part 1”

I am pretty sure Mr. Garrioch and Namdo would be confused at the title of my post. “열꽃” is a Korean word that beautifully describes an ugly thing. “열” means “heat”, while “꽃” is a word that means “flower”. So the word “열꽃” means “heat-flower”. But there is no such plant called heat-flower. The expression “heat-flower” is used to describe the symptom of measles having red eruptions all over the body. The word is used more frequently to describe the symptoms of measles for babies.

The title of Tablo’s new album is “열꽃”. What can we infer from this title? Maybe it could be a story of Tablo suffering measles. Or maybe his baby daughter is suffering from one. Or maybe he is comparing himself with a baby who is suffering from measles. Maybe he is comparing the sorrow he feels with measles.

<집>

This is the first song of the whole mini-album. The biggest point of the song is the beautifully done metaphor. Tablo compares his sorrows with a house. His song is about how the house he lives in is so comfortable, although it means endless sorrow if he never comes out.

I believe this song portrays the emotions of a person who is depressed for a long time. When I was shocked and depressed because of an incident. The depression went on for a quite a long time. And when it was time that I should be out of it, I was so used to the sorrow. It’s rather hard to explain, but being used to sadness is a rather comfortable thing. Because a sad person tends to be alone, the aloofness becomes a part of him.

The song compares other’s demands as “stack of newspapers and mails in front of the door” and being happy as “taking a short walk outside”. Taking a short walk implies that he would come back soon.

<나쁘다>

“Ones whom I love the most hurt me the most.” People sometimes have to become dark to protect his beloved ones. Similar idea is portrayed in the Godfather Trilogy. But after one turns dark for his beloved, then the beloved ones show disdain.

It is always the kind ones who jump into the abyss for others. They do it to prevent others from taking the same path. Depravity follows sacrifice.

That is why the speaker in the song can’t sleep well. He becomes more and more aggressive or colder to protect others. Love for others become Hamartia for the protagonist of one’ own life. It makes them hypocritical and corrupt, and finally loses their beloved ones. Tablo seems to feel such depravity to protect his family as a young adult.

“Battle not with monsters, lest ye become a monster, and if you gaze into the abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.”- Friedrich Nietzsche

<밀물>

Is there anything more alike to life like tides? Why resist the current and quarrel with the flood? After all, the world is a small fishbowl. It is meaningless to escape from fishhooks and be relieved.

This song puts a lot of metaphor for the listeners to understand. It never criticizes; it describes. Because the song is sad and melancholy, it is actually more critical than rap songs filled with swear words. It depicts. How we’re all part of the same hypocrisy. How the world teaches us ethics, and the next moment rips our heart. How our dignity is thinner than a single bundle of Benjamins. How promises get broken easily just like pinky fingers. (children use their pinky fingers when they promise, right?)

So let it go. Instead of fighting them, burning in fury, let us inhale and exhale. After a big flame ignites, only ashes remain. Let the world in yourself. Forgive them and yourself as well. Be inundated.

Just drown.

<밑바닥에서>

In English, it would mean Rock Bottom. This reminded me of Eminem’s song with a similar title, Rock Bottom, but the content was clearly different. While Eminem’s Rock Bottom was a young adult enflaming in wrath, disgusted at injustice and poverty, willing to “f- the world”, Tablo’s song is more like an apology to his wife.

Tablo is a graduate of Stanford University, having Master’s Degree on English Literature. This was a great merit for a Korean musician. So he was able to express his talents before a big audience earlier than other musicians of his age. But as always, haters gonna hate no matter what it does. Some people, probably jealous, formed an internet café for the purpose of criticizing Tablo. They made futile efforts to prove that his degree was fraud, along with his other achievements. They wanted to take down his wife as well, even though it was just past honeymoon.

It must have been hard for Tablo, but especially for his wife. So this song is like an apology at the very bottom of his and her life.

“Every time you smile, I feel guilty. That smile could’ve been wider. You say everything’s ok, but I guess that’s what I just manage to give you. I wanted you to take my half, but not the half of my sorrows. I’m sorry that this roof of our house became your ceiling. I’m sorry that I am your umbrella and rain.”

Horrible translation, but this song would touch anyone who catches the context of apology and guiltiness.

.

<Airbag>

Airbag. How is it different from seatbelts? An airbag is a vehicle safety device. It consists of a flexible envelope designed to inflate rapidly during an automobile collision. Seatbelts secure the driver against harmful movements. But the two have some big differences.

Seatbelt is a strict and hard piece of cloth that secures, restricts the user’s movement for the user’s safety. Not only that, it is used quite often by drivers. Whenever the driver uses the brake is too abruptly, or the car behind slightly bumps, seatbelt is used.

But not airbags. One never sees airbags too often. Airbags activate only when a great impulse is done onto the driver. It is used when a big accident that shouldn’t happen is already occurring. It does not restrict; it lets the driver absorb the same impulse, only which it lets the driver take in such impact with slightly longer time.

Tablo uses this metaphor in his song Airbag to depict the sorrow he feels during his life. The song is a soliloquy of a man in a taxi cab after work. He observes the view outside the window along with the taxi driver.

The taxi driver is upset at a friend who refuses to drink with him. Ironically, the driver has put a photograph of his family on the car. The driver is obviously avoiding to go home. Then the speaker in the song raises a question. Why do men wander? Is it because there is no place to go? Or is it that there is no one to welcome them? I believe these questions would have incised Korean boys and men.

For boys, they would feel loneliness from circulating academies and schools. Surrounded by cut-throat competitive peers and demanding parents, they would feel there is no one to welcome them. Same for fathers. After a long day's work, his wife is sleeping, while the sons are busy studying. The loneliness is far greater than housewives who at least see their sons during the day. Very Korean emotions. And Tablo expresses it pretty well.

열꽃. I don't think there would be any other foreign language that has words particularly describing baby's measles by using the concepts of heat and flower. The word holds  connotation of a suffering of a very vulnerable person, like a child. Maybe Tablo wanted to express his sorrows of becoming a man with a family from a young adult.

Lyrics: ★★★★★
Beat: ★★★★★
Overall: ★★★★★